Oliver’s Twist

Someone wanted to ask me out, so I gave them my email to ask me out. It takes a lot more time and effort to write an email rather than a text, and I want people to put the effort in for me. So they wrote me a haiku, short, but still an email.


Curious minds meet
Correspondence digital
Coffee to follow?

So I aptly responded,


I’d never thought I’d find someone who would
Contain enough audacity to ask
Me out through email. The system really should
Be used more like this to unmask

The frivolous ability to swipe
And act facetious when it comes to dates.
I would imagine that I’m not the type
Depending on these dating apps for fate.

I’ll have you know that dating me may be
Disasterous, but it also could turn
Amazingly. I guess we’ll have to see.
You never truly know until you learn.

I’m sorry that this took some time to think,
Although, I’d love to meet you for a drink.

(Don’t look too closely at the structure, it’s totally wrong from the usual Elizabethan sonnet.)

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